Tuesday, September 10, 2013
.Size doesn't matter.
I don't often share fan letters, but this came to me via email last night, and I was so moved by it. Often I come under fire for "promoting obesity" among other ridiculous claims, but people often forget that every (yes, EVERY) woman has some kind of issue with their body. It doesn't matter what size you are, we all feel some sort of misconception about our bodies, or "problem" that if we fix, life would be grand..right?! Or at least so we think. I'm honored to be able to inspire other women with my work and words, and to know that I have some impact on others is why I keep pushing on. I know at times it seems redundant, but there is always someone that it helps, or needs to hear it- heck, I need it too!
I know it's long, but I had to share it with you:
"Hey Tess! You will NEVER KNOW how much you have helped me. You've reached areas in my life that I thought were doomed to be dysfunctional for the rest of my life. I've recently started following you on Instagram, and it was one of the best decisions I have ever made. I don't struggle with being overweight, but I do struggle very hard. In the past two years I've had two babies, and been diagnose with stage 4 melanoma. Between my pregnancies and the surgeries, it left my body sad, used up, scarred, and tired. I lost 50 pounds in two weeks, weight I couldn't afford To lose as it is. Leaving me a frail 92 pounds, no curves, just protruding bones, stealing my nice juicy ass, and taking my bust from a 34D to a 32B. I HATED my body! I HATED how skinny I was, my lack of curves, my lack if energy to work out to get the curves. I constantly deal with people, sometimes complete strangers, saying to me "omg! Look how tiny you are! You're so skinny! I wish I was that small!" I have my biggest insecurity thrown in my face everywhere I turn. I mean, what if i walked up to a bigger person and was like "omg! look how fat you are! thats unbelievable!" it hurts me in the same way that would hurt them. Everytime it happens I get a little more self conscious. I know it sounds silly to some people, but this is not silly to me. It's a very real, painful struggle I have. It's a struggle that's effected how I live my life, it's effected my sex life, my desire to even leave the house was nonexistent. It shook me to my very core. Since I've started following your posts.. Reading the comments, following links that are put up, I've been so encouraged, inspired, and even relieved at times. You, your fans, and followers will never know how they've helped me heal! I let my fiancé see me naked do the first time in months. And I didn't even feel ashamed. You did that for me. You did that for us. I took my babies to the pool and wore a two piece, unapologetically I flaunted my scars and rib cage that you can clearly see. Your eff your beauty standards movement has saved me. It's saved my relationship, it helped me find my smile and my confidence. It reminded me, I AM worthy of love, of loving MYSELF! I could never thank you for what you have done for me AND my family. So, from the other side of the spectrum, with all the boney 92 pounds i have, I'm shouting EFF YOUR BEAUTY STANDARDS as loudly as I can. Thank you Tess. Thank you so much!"